[ There are so many parts of Kaoru that contrast one another that, at times, it feels like he's at war with himself. He wants all of Kojiro's attention, wants to not share him with anyone even if that means the irritation of jealousy when women flirt with the man who was once the most eligible bachelor in Okinawa. He wants to be the only one, and he simultaneously wants everyone to know it so they'll stay away while also keeping this precious thing secret and thus safe. He wants to be secure in his sexuality, but he wants to be safe from hatred towards it; He wants to be successful despite prejudice, and he wants to avoid being praised in spite of it. Kaoru has never thought of himself as a gay man but rather a man who happens to be gay, and the thought of people around him shifting that paradigm is frightening. He's Cherry Blossom, the high-tech analytical skater, and he's Sakurayashiki Kaoru, the talented calligrapher and digital artist. Nowhere in his image of himself is there room for being "the gay skater" or "the gay caligrapher" or even "that chef's gay boyfriend." He doesn't want those things for Kojiro, either, who puts so much work into his body for the sake of skating and so much love into his food for the restaurant.
At the same time, there is nothing he wants more than to be a couple in public who can hold hands as they walk down the street and kiss each other when they part ways. He wants to be a pair, wants to claim Kojiro and be claimed in return, wants women to be jealous of him for being the one to take the casanova of Okinawa off the market. Even though the thought of losing to Kojiro's terms strikes a stab of fear into him, there's a bigger thrill of desire when he considers what it would be like to kiss Kojiro where they could be seen. Maybe, just maybe, S could be a place for them to be out together. They're founding members and respected skaters, and if someone is going to try and out them with claims of seeing them suck face at an illegal event, it would be shooting themselves in the foot by admitting they were there to witness it.
Kaoru sucks in a breath and bites back a snappy retort that nearly bubbles forth on instinct. There's no reason for him to scold Kojiro for suggesting something that makes Kaoru warm all over. ] When I win, you have to kneel in front of me and beg for it.
the absolute nerve of dw not notifying me of your tag
At the same time, there is nothing he wants more than to be a couple in public who can hold hands as they walk down the street and kiss each other when they part ways. He wants to be a pair, wants to claim Kojiro and be claimed in return, wants women to be jealous of him for being the one to take the casanova of Okinawa off the market. Even though the thought of losing to Kojiro's terms strikes a stab of fear into him, there's a bigger thrill of desire when he considers what it would be like to kiss Kojiro where they could be seen. Maybe, just maybe, S could be a place for them to be out together. They're founding members and respected skaters, and if someone is going to try and out them with claims of seeing them suck face at an illegal event, it would be shooting themselves in the foot by admitting they were there to witness it.
Kaoru sucks in a breath and bites back a snappy retort that nearly bubbles forth on instinct. There's no reason for him to scold Kojiro for suggesting something that makes Kaoru warm all over. ] When I win, you have to kneel in front of me and beg for it.